I say unfortunately, not because there are gay ducks. Because, in fact, there are. All animal species have some example of homosexuality, some more than others. Most monkeys, for example, are really comfortable with it.

I don't say unfortunately because of gay marriage. Ducks do, in fact, mate for life. HOWEVER, we also say that humans mate for life, and that doesn't mean we don't all have homosexual affairs on the side. Which is fine, just, in the future, try to be open about it.

I say unfortunately, because during the research for this Ask An Elephant (yes, we do actually research your questions, calm down), I came upon this:

http://www.nmr.nl/DSA8-243.pdf

Just in case you can't read that pdf document, here's a summary. Some dude was working at a nature museum in Rotterdam, when a male wild duck slammed into the glass and died. Startled but determined, he headed outside to go bury the duck. But by the time he got to the quacky corpse, it was already being raped by another male duck, who continued the process for about 75 minutes.

Then this dude, who we'll call C.W. Moelilker, wrote a thesis paper about it. Yipes.

No, I don't think you're suffering from sketch comedy withdrawal. Symptoms of THAT fatal malady include having a desperate need to dress like a pirate, fight bears or robots, and ask what everybody is doing, before running out of the room screaming.

In fact, I think you're suffering from Lynyrd Skynyrd withdrawal. Which is reasonable.

Many Skynyrd (as the band is known to its devotees) fans have never gotten over the tragic death of lead singer/co-founder Ronnie Van Zant, guitarist Steve Gaines and Steve's sister, back up vocalist Cassie Gaines in a plane crash in October of 1977.

The only way to truly honor their memory is to live the way they died.

Actually, I think I meant to say live the way they lived, no one wants to live in a constant state of plane crash. Rewind!

The only way to truly honor their memory is to live the way they lived: rocking as hard as you possibly can. Whether its to down home country hits like "Sweet Home Albama," or good old songs from the country like "Gimme Three Steps," no-one soft rocked harder than Lynyrd Skynyrd.

And of course, who can forget "Free Bird?" That song was immortalized when the survivors, some of whom were temporarily crippled - physically as well as emotionally - reunited in January 1979 for a special appearance at Charlie Daniel's Volunteer Jam V where they performed an instrumental version of "Free Bird" as a eulogy for their lost comrades and the band.

However, barring the above, I'd have to say it's our excellent Television Advertisments, or, as you call them on your side of the pond, "adverts."

Since Lands of Larry opened in December of 2003, tickets have been in high demand. Granted, there was a lot of pre-opening buzz. And the opening night party, featuring performances by P. Diddy and Lenny Kravitz certainly kicked things off. But since then, it's really the Lands of Larry marketing department that's taken the ball, ran with it, and kicked it out of the park, since in this metaphor, we're playing kickball.

We knew this wouldn't be an easy sell... A sketch comedy group themed Amusment Park? Who would want to go to that?

Granted, we had the product. "Lance & Evan's Trip to France" was a fun ride for the whole family, complete with animatronic Frenchmen. "Placrototle's Tower of Terror" was great for the scary ride crowd. And of course, there's "Journey to the Center of Chris."

But the problem is, you gotta get people there in the first place, before they can tell other people how awesome your Theme Park is.

That's where the marketing came in. I'm not going to bother describing the commercials, because you've all seen them by now. And, as you know, we've been very succesful in targeting the Irish audience. So hats off to our marketing department, I say!

And, as a special thank you for asking this elephant... ummm... asking this question, here's some inside scoop for you:

December.

2004.

The opening of:

Euro-Lands of Larry!

No need to ache anymore Calvin, cause we're coming to your side of the pond!

Basically, what I'm implying here is that I'm 99% sure your question was posed in Czech, language of the Czech Republic, formerly Czechoslovakia.

So naturally, for help in this endeavor, I turned to the Elephant Larry Language Department. Luckily for me, who was stopping by at that exact moment, but famous Czech director, Milos Forman!