Features --> Restaurant Reviews
San Loco
124 Second Avenue
New York, NY 10003
Phone: (212) 260-7948
sanloco.com
San Loco is some of the most abysmal, gloppy, Mexican food I've ever eaten, and yet it has three locations in New York City and people seem to like it.
Okay, let's back up for a second... over the guy who thought of opening up San Loco! No seriously, I would kill him with my bare hands if I could, but let's start from the top... of his head by bashing him with a lead pipe!
Anywho. San Loco is a little Mexican bodega type place. They serve quickly, have small shops, and relative to the normal five or six dollar burritos you can get in NYC, they're pretty cheap. But like my grand-pappy used to say, "You pay for what you get." Although I don't remember handing the guy at San Loco a steaming pile of crap.
One of the things that I personally enjoy about Mexican food is the combination of mush and crisp, i.e. beans and lettuce; melted cheese and rice; tortilla chips and salsa. Although a nice crispy tomato salsa isn't that bad.
What San Loco does is put your entire dish through a gigantic mushing machine. They give you your burrito, which has some tasteless stewed onions, red sauce, and cheese in it. Then, they take everything else, and put it on top of the burrito. Correct me if I'm wrong, but if you're putting all the beans and rice and lettuce and (inexplicably) chickpeas on top of an already sealed burrito, how is it a burrito? It's not. Somebody should make them look up the definition of the word toppings, because they apparently think "toppings" means "innards."
This all would be fine if San Loco's food tasted good, and here, I think, is the inherent problem, because they haven't figured that out yet. I'm thinking about opening a cardboard restaurant next to every San Loco, because honestly, once people make the comparison, I think they'll prefer what I have to offer.
The only positive item San Loco has to offer, and yes, I am throwing a bone to them here (speaking of which, I've never tried the meat based dishes, but would not be surprised to find that they're full of bones... sweet, crispy bones), is their basic nachos.
The nachos, are, of course, your garden variety tortilla chips. Then they're smothered in processed nacho cheese, with a dollop of sour cream, a smattering of jalapeņos, and a little bit of red sauce. And, they're only $2.50. For fifty cents extra, you can get two spoonfuls of beans or rice, which actually isn't that bad.
Consistent with San Loco's corporate policy, the whole thing turns to glop in about five minutes, but really, for $3 I'm not complaining. And I do have a huge soft spot for fakey nachos, so there you go.
Point being, if you like food that's cheap and bad, go to San Loco. If you don't, there's a pizza place right across the street. I'm sure they can put some beans and rice on top of your pizza, and you'll get the same sensation as eating at San Loco, but it won't make you want to die or kill someone.
- Alexander Zalben<
...Cut to five months later. I'm promoting the website on one of the message boards I frequent, when somebody tells me I'm TOTALLY wrong about San Loco. Anyway, here's their post:
Alex, I read your site, and I liked it, but I have a major quibble: your horrific review of San Loco.
If you think their food is all gloppy-goo smeary innards, then you are not ordering the right things. I know you're a vegetarian, but it's remiss to review a place based solely on the quality of the beans -- refried or otherwise -- that they're loading into their burritos.
It's too bad that you didn't experience the wonder that is San Loco's spicy shredded chicken -- this hot pile of tasty meat, when dropped into a Guaco Loco or Queso Loco, is completely delicious.
I think you would love the Guaco or Queso Loco, even without chicken, because each provides the perfect texture combination you admit to desiring -- crispy and chewy, mushy and crunchy. The Guaco takes a hard taco shell and uses guacamole as the glue for a soft taco shell, which serves as the outer layer. The insides are basic taco ingredients. The Queso, of course, uses melted cheese as the glue. I like to get one of each, because I can never decide which one is more delicious (actually, the Guaco is empirically more delicious, but it's hard to avoid melted cheese).
I hope you'll give San Loco another chance, especially in light of the fact that Chipotle is owned by McDonald's...
Megan
Far be it from me to let anyone show me up, or doubt my methods. Or contradict me in any manner. So the very day of reading that message, I marched over to San Loco, and ordered one bean Guaco Loco, and one bean Queso Loco. Here are my findings:
- I think they've changed their methods, because I did see them actually wrapping a burrito up, rather than throwing down a tortilla and then the filling on top of it (which, by my definition, is NOT a burrito). Also, I don't remember seeing the Guaco or Queso Loco on the menu before.
- I'm still not crazy about the flavor of the beans... They're very peppery, so at least have some flavor, and the sauce is okay, but not great. Also, one tiny slice of tomato on top of each taco? Come on.
- That being said, the guac is pretty good, although in my case the taste was WAY over-powered by the beans, and, I'd have to assume, would be by the chicken. The cheese, on the other hand, is actually rather good, and compliments the bean taco nicely.
- I DO like the crunchy/soft combo, and having the soft taco on the outside helps hold together the crunchy taco on the inside. Which is very practical.
- They carry Fizzy Lizzy brand drinks, and more importantly, the Cranberry flavor, which is DELICIOUS... The perfect amount of cranberry taste, without the over-whelming tartness of some juices.
In conclusion? I'm not going to completely change my opinion about San Loco. I've talked to a lot of people who love it with an almost religious fervor. I'm not one of those people.
But the Guaco Loco, and the Queso Loco weren't half bad, and if they are wrapping their burritos now, I'll certainly try one. I'm not going to necessarily revise my previous estimation of the place, because up until today, I haven't had anything I'd consider "good." But at least there's some stuff that's not bad, as well.
